Bôa, Twilight

I should start this by saying I have not seen Serial Experiments Lain. Let’s get that out of the way first.

I, like so many others, discovered this album through TikTok audios. I’ve been off tiktok and most social media for that matter for about a year, but when I was on this song was all over the place as your typical Y2K depressed global coffeehouse aesthetic posting backing, behind fit checks and trans fem meme slideshows and room tours and baking videos and all sorts of digital content.

I hate that word so much, content. It takes the artistry that goes into even a simple TikTok and boils it down into a mindless slew of data categorized by length, file size and whatever buzzwords the artificial intelligence catches on as it passes over like a glacier carving grooves into the land, not by any choice of its own but by the nature of its awesome oppressive force. The constant stream of Content people receive, not seek out but are provided with worries me. It worries me not that we’re encouraging low quality production with no forethought that doesn’t provoke further thinking, as a matter of fact it took me so long to quit TikTok because the videos it was feeding me were well made and thought provoking. What worries me is that theres so much of it, to the point where you can easily swipe past 100 videos, either with or without watching them through, and not engage mentally with what you saw.

Well I decided to break that cycle, I got rid of social media (except for Tumblr, but I’ve got problems with that too) and now engage with my media critically! Right? Well it would help to illustrate my point by going down my media consumption itinerary point by point. I listen to music critically, writing these reviews has helped with that. Video games, I haven’t played them as much this year but when I do I get more enjoyment out of them. News, I check NPR and the verge (before they went subscription…) regularly and listen to my local public radio station when I care to be depressed by the news. Books, well I don’t really read like I wanted to, in fact I read less now than I did before. And online media like YouTube I still binge mindlessly, only a few videos this year have really made me engage in an impactful way. It’s just another stream of content for me to scroll through before relistening to the Daytona USA 2 Power Edition soundtrack again and scrolling Tumblr, which is also happy to feed me an endless stream of new posts from strangers. Strangers, with all of their anger and sadness and grief, unimaginable grief.

I can’t escape this cycle, can I? I got rid of my iPhone for a year and still fell in, using my laptop to endlessly scroll instead of my phone. All I've done is isolate myself from other people my age, from the culture and world around me. I’m too far gone.



Hey, wasn’t this a review of Twilight? Or, was it about Lain? Maybe it’s about separating the art from the context we’re so familiar with. Separate Twilight and the song Duvet and the entirety of Bôa from Lain and TikTok and the endless stream of content and you’ll be happier for it. Also, don’t harp on people for discovering music from TikTok audios, I’ve done it plenty and I’ve found things I would’ve never considered before. Twilight is a wonderful album, and I wish I could get a copy physically without coughing up hundreds of dollars. Oh well, it’s easily findable on the web. Free yourself, Neo.

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